listening to a dark ambient music station... is really depressing. especially in the morning. i think this is at the very least afternoon music. and i listening to echo and the bunnymen during breakfast. jeez. i guess i want to be morose.
It's no mystery really, why I am so tired so often. I sometimes act like it's a plague from the skies but actually it's all too obvious. I mean, reminder number one: Red Cross just called me about donating. I love donating, would do it all the time, only the last THREE times, I've been deferred because I'm anemic. Hmmm. Now iron would be a good thing! Then there's the fact that I don't sleep nearly enough. That's a compulsion of mine -- even if I *can* go to bed early, I won't because after 11 a little devil starts whispering in my ear all these cool ideas about what I should be doing, reading, writing... and then it's 1:30 and oh, yes, the plan is to leave for work at 7. Then I walk to work and that's exercise but not the kind I need to make me have energy. Today I noticed that when I don't wear tights or hose, I still get chaffing because my thighs tough. Ugh. If I could stand the idea of somebody telling me what to do, that'd probably help me with all of this ("Wendy, eat that spinach, go to bed and do your exercise!") but as it is, all there is is willpower and moments of desperation.
So of course I've gotta be the Virgin Goddess of Wisdom! He he he...
I graduated high school.
Back in the days when we lived together, Caleb and I used to do this thing every night called PLJ ("Peace Love and Joy") where we'd lay and bed and do this as a way of destressing and staying positive. I feel a similar urge tonight.
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