November 16th, 2003

black

Two weeks later

Well, two weeks after my appointment with the allergist and to my disappointment, it seems like although there has been some improvement, for the most part I feel just as crappy as before. (Especially right now, since most of my symptoms are especially bad first thing in the morning.)

I'm not sneezing anymore and my lungs and nasal passages do feel more clear, but at the same time, my nose is still all stuffy. This is true even though I got encasings for my mattress and pillows, which was supposed to stave off dust mites. Meanwhile there is still stinky gunk in my head which the doctor diagnosed as being from a sinus infection. Maybe it is a sinus infection, but those icky drugs I took for it didn't kill it! My ears are still all sore and my eyes are itchy. (Maybe a humidifier would help?)

Yeah, I definitely am not that much better. I'm supposed to call for a follow-up appointment for the end of this month. I kind of wonder what I'm supposed to tell the doctor b/c we both felt sure we had figured things out. I hope I don't have to take some YET yickier drugs.
  • Current Mood
    disappointed disappointed
black

The Eagle Has Landed

That is, the black eagle of death and depression has landed on my freakin' head. It happened around noon. I got this pain over my left eye and suddenly the dreaded dark was upon me. The good news is, this should last no longer than a day. Too bad I planned to DO stuff today!

Actually, to be postive (trying!), I have done a lot today. Totally uncharacteristic of me, I manage to clean up the whole house, included dealing with the dreaded piles of mail, bills, receipts, etc. I even cleaned the bathtub and the shower stall, which honestly I rarely bother with. Did some laundry too, did my dishes. Also did around 100 pages more proofreading for the IP edition of Wraiths.

The fact that I did all this stuff is actually what clues me in to the feelings I'm having being a chemical manifestation. Because with me, I don't have actual bad things going on in my life, I just suddenly get super super tired and my head and chest feel like I'm either about to cry or I have just cried for like an hour. My body temperature goes up and I don't want to go anywhere. If I do / am dragged out, I feel like I'm dead or something.

I bet tomorrow I'll be scarily cheerful!
  • Current Mood
    depressed depressed
ice cream

Grumbling Tummy

Well, I think I must have successfully dieted today, because despite having a proper and perfectly decent and yummy breakfast, lunch and dinner, my body is now desperately demanding the 500-800 calories I would normally give it by virtue of being a pig in the second-helping, snacking, fridge-diving department. Go me!

P.S. My icon is very ironic. Darn, I'm going to Germany in two weeks, and I'm wondering how I will manage. Maybe I can skip two meals just so I can have the ice cream?

P.P.S. My bad feeling part of my depression lifted sometime around 5, the exhaustion ended around 8, after Caleb had been visiting. Suddenly I felt I could do work again.
  • Current Music
    Binary, Cruxshadows