August 16th, 2004

sideview, obamame_sideview

Time for bed!

Often, like right now, I find myself staying up late for no reason other than I somehow think I can do more, suck out of life, by being awake for two or three pointless hours during which I don't do anything significant. Now if I took those hours and slept, at least I'd have dreams and rest.

Now other times, I'm up late for a reason, being creative or social usually. Like doing a site design or chatting online with somebody like xanath or writing. That's fine. My creative period is late at night.

But this phenomenon where from 11 to 1:30 I just am roaming around, surfing the web, eating, being random... Seems ill-considered to me. It's not insomnia, since I know if I went to bed I'd fall asleep. I think what it is is that I'm used to having this big burst of creativity and *things to do* late at night and even if I *don't*, I feel like I should so I stay awake "just in case."

*hmmmm, psychoanalyzing self*

I think if I feel like there's nothing I want to do, I should just go to bed.

Speaking of which...
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    blah blah
sideview, obamame_sideview

Monday, Monday...

This is not a good omen.

Another fine mess in the making in Florida
By Molly Ivins
Nationally Syndicated Columnist
Florida, the Fun State, is off to a fast start on election shenanigans this year. Undeterred by the state's electoral disgrace in 2000, elections officials there have all but publicly announced, "We're going to cheat again."


F.B.I. Goes Knocking for Political Troublemakers
By Eric Lichtbau
New York Times
The Federal Bureau of Investigation has been questioning political demonstrators across the country, and in rare cases even subpoenaing them, in an aggressive effort to forestall what officials say could be violent and disruptive protests at the Republican National Convention in New York.


Great.
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    aggravated aggravated
black

Suck

In other depressing news, the NY Times reports that the grunge, Goth, punk, and 80s pink/black/turqoise looks are out with teens and college kids, replaced by a preppy look... that of course nobody wants to call preppy but is in fact preppy. Apprently sales at Hot Topic have plummetted and sales at American Eagle and Gap are way up. Viva la Khaki, I guess. Now on the good side of this, I guess I can get all my black and pink clothes on sale if I hurry up and go to the mall.

One other depressing bit of news is that after lurking in the background for 3-4 days, depression arrived on me last night and is fully settled on me this morning, along with the usual headache. Gee, and I was wondering why I didn't get any work done this weekend. I put it off to today. When of course I don't want to do it because thinking about it makes me want to cry. Such enthusiasm! Alas, I will probably make myself just plod on and hope for a self-correction, which should come by Wednesday.
  • Current Mood
    depressed depressed
sideview, obamame_sideview

Hopeful despite feeling generally hopeless

This doesn't really alleviate my ill mood, but I got a call this morning from director of the the retirement community and he is *very* interested in meeting with me to discuss the bid I put in. I really want this job. If I get it, it will pay my bills for like 3 months. And it's not going to be that much work either.
  • Current Music
    something Baroque
sideview, obamame_sideview

Clients and their ideas

Mat Man has me FINALLY doing his site's home page. The big problem is his idea is really STUPID. I have tried telling him that simply having his left navigation and the middle of the page a big collage of his products is just, well, LAME, but he says he wants things "visual." The page really, REALLY needs some text, in my opinion. I don't know why he can't do a "featured product," a welcome blurb, or something normal. Maybe if I tell him this page will do worse than a text page in the search engines, he'll be more convinced. It's IS true after all. Gah. Really don't want this home page to happen b/c it will look bad on my portfolio, even though the rest of the site is cool.
  • Current Mood
    aggravated aggravated
black

One of those Hulk days

Every time I try to start working on this Mat Tech stuff, I start crying and cursing -- literally. I just want it to GO AWAY! I'd like to call Mat Man and tell him to go fuck himself. Absolutely not rational and undeserved, but I am such a vicious pissed off mood, that's what I feel like saying. I have emails from all sorts of other clients, neighbors, friends wanting this, that, the other thing. No offense (if any of them is you reading) but I'd like them all to fuck off to. I want just outside running and errand and I had impulse to just start cussing everybody out. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Nothing has happened to piss me off or make me depressed. I just woke up this way. Which, predictably, also pisses me off. Like, hello, I need to WORK, I need to be efficient, pleasant, unphased. Photo-retouching should not cause me to go running to my bed and start *pounding* on the pillows and mattresses and ranting at high volume, as has happened twice today. I feel so maniacal, or is it manic? I want to run around in circles or scream or find some bricks I can slam together and make dust.

Caleb is coming back tonight. I have a feeling he will have 0% tolerance for this mood. I will *try* not to blow up at him for no reason.
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    infuriated infuriated
firstgrade

Do you know where the states are?

Surprisingly, when I took The USA Quiz, I got a score of 149 of a max total of 150. I say surprisingly because a few years ago I had a computer program that was the same as this online quiz and I used to mess up a lot more, especially in the Southeast. This time I found I was pretty unerring; the only mistake I had was mixing up Montana and Wyoming, which is kind of understandable, in my opinion! I'd be interested in seeing what other people get. Probably somebody will get a 150.

Somehow this makes me slightly less grumpy. Lame, but true.

--

Now let me see what I get for the other quizzes...

Got a perfect score on the very easy World Quiz, since it was only continents and oceans.

On the Europe Quiz I got only 86 of 111, not so great, 77%.

For Asia I got 67 of 84... hmm, about 80%.

I took all the other quizzes too, and did crappier on all of them, which doesn't surprise me.
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    blah blah