March 6th, 2005

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WARNING: May Contain Larva

So Caleb and I just experienced another "SciFi Original Movie." This one was of the same amazing quality as Frankenfish!

I wish I weren't about to go to bed, because I'd love to do a full review right now, while I can remember the details, but for now let me say that Larva was a lot grosser than the mutant killer Chinese fish movie, but just as funny and with comparable special effects and acting.

Here is the plot summary, taken from the SciFi web site:

Host, Mo., is a quiet ranching community where everyone knows everyone else, and almost everybody earns their living from a local meat-products packager, Host Tender Meats.

New to town is veterinarian Eli Rudkus, who makes Host his home after his predecessor retires, leaving a professional vacancy that Eli is happy to fill. However, when Eli is called to the ranch of Jacob Long, a local cattleman, the young veterinarian's seemingly routine house call exposes a dangerous secret about Host Tender Meats that could annihilate this small town.

Eli's efforts to warn the town are thwarted by Fletcher Odermatt, the owner of Host Tender Meats. Odermatt is willing to go to any lengths to keep his company's dark secret buried. To that end, he enlists cutthroat attorney Hayley Anderson to smear Eli's reputation.

Before long, though, Eli and Jocob convince Hayley that what started as a small "parasite problem" is now a disaster on the verge of becoming too large to contain. As catastrophe looms, the trio races against time, nature and science to save their town — and perhaps the world.


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Highlights of movie include:

- Actress playing lawyer trying (and failing) to disguise her British accent
- Town "boss" behind evil wears cowboy hat, large belt buckle, pointy beard
- Drawn out scene of people eating beef infected with mutant parasites
- Dead dogs, exploding cattle, exploding people (think: Alien)
- Gratuitous scenes of people showering or having sex, then exploding
- Monsters that fly when they attack, but creep around on ground to be scary
- Monsters that look kind of like starfish-bats
- Hospital basement with a really nasty, unclean morgue (WTF?)
- Lots of guns going off -- esp. shotguns
- Best line in movie: "You better start working for THE PEOPLE now!"
- That whole pun on the word "host" (the name of the town)
- So much illogic and bad science it makes your head spin... and then some

Interestingly, the ad sponsors for this movie appeared to have included Arby's, Oscar Mayer, and Chili's. Mmmmm, want some MEAT? (The vet in the movie is a vegetarian, BTW.)
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
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Paint Ideas

I'm getting closer to settling on paint colors for the three rooms I want to do. Actually it started out with just the bathroom, but now I want to do the bedroom and office, too.

Here are the colors:


Note: These colors looks more like childish primary
colors here than they really are. Much lighter and brighter.


The only thing I'm not certain of is the trim. Currently all the trim in the house is an off-white. Caleb says I should probably do over it and also that, at least with the blue, avoid using white or off-white, because it would look too "Wal-Mart." In the office I might be OK leaving it, as off-white and gold go well. The red and off-white might work too -- been there, done that -- but again, might look a little cheezy.

Anybody with ideas on trim, let me know. I'm kind of scared of the whole trim thing because in the bedroom especially there is a LOT of it -- I'd be painting 3 huge window frames, a double-closet, 5 doors, plus crown and baseboard molding (in other words, the walls are only about 20% "wall").
  • Current Mood
    curious curious
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Homophobia in action

mroctober has shared an email he recently received from a friend about being invited to speak to a Gay Straight Alliance at a high school in Virginia and then having that invitation unceremoniously, and rather backhandedly, renegged based on parental pressure. Anyway, I think some people on my F list would be interested in hearing this report from the trenches, so here's the link.

The part of the letter that gets my goat isn't even the main issue, but this line:
I have also discovered that since this entire brouhaha began, Manchester High School allowed a preacher to come on to the campus to "pray" for the gay students, and 'drive the gay demons' out of them.

Again I will voice the pessimistic, selfish and not altogether nice opinion that it's a very good thing I'm not having kids because constant exposure to issues like this (a.k.a. wacko bullshit) would ruin my health and mind.
  • Current Mood
    aggravated aggravated
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Zombie Work

On days like today, when I've just spent 4 hours creating oh-so-special PDFs for Mat Man -- one for each of his 48 products -- I derive consolation from the fact that it could be worse, work-wise. I could still be working for the state government doing county health department pages, which require you do do any change (stats update, new maps, etc.) 159 times since (big sigh) this state has 159 friggin' counties. Doing county pages was the only time I ever experienced anything like carpal tunnel problems. These 48 product are merely giving me a stiff neck. Allllllllllmost done now.
  • Current Mood
    bored bored