October 11th, 2005

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Krazy Kitsch

I still have more Vermont pictures to share, and these are fun ones -- pictures from Caleb's grandparents' house. They have a truly refined sense of style, at least when it comes to KITSCH. I've visited over there before and marvelled but this was the first time I've ever managed pictures. I would have taken more but obviously I couldn't go around the whole house taking pictures when I was actually talking to grandma and grandpa. They are very sweet and both of them hate Bush ("that man!")

From far off, you can't see the beauty...

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National Coming Out Day

Before I get down to work, I thought I'd do what lots of people are doing and make a post about coming out, since it's National Coming Out Day. Or at least start one. I may break this into several parts.


I had almost no awareness of my own sexuality until I graduated high school. I just did not give a care about any of "that stuff." Later I realized I had had some crushes and obvious identity issues, but I was never conscious of them. Other people had told me they thought I was a lesbian, but I was like, "Ew, I hate women, I'd rather be a gay man." I just couldn't accept it really.

However, my subconscious was definitely figuring stuff out. My senior year, I was in a special course where the final project involved teaching a two-day lesson on a culture. I led my group to pick "Gays in San Francisco." They went along with it and based on books and videos, we taught a classful of kids about sexual orientation, coming out, homophobia, and Lawrence Ferlinghetti. We showed clips from Pink Triangles and PBS's "One in Ten" show. At the time I had no inkling I might be gay, nor did I realize that probably half the class was, given that the class was an interdisciplinary art-history-writing course full of non-conformists.

It was because of that course that when I finally did realize what was going on with me, I didn't have a negative reaction at all. I was at my friend Teresa's house sometime the summer after graduation, and she was going on about how pretty I was, sat on my lap and kissed me. In the end this wasn't really a lesbian thing, just a friendly thing on her part, but it was a huge revelation to me. My reaction to it wasn't so much, "Ew! I must be a lesbian for liking that!" as "Whoah! That must be what sexuality is like!" LOL. But even then, I knew I wasn't a lesbian. My thought was, "Well, I like women, but I know I like men. OK." Nobody has ever been able to tell me different and my feelings haven't changed much.

After that first kiss, things changes drastically for me. But that's a whole other story, which I will tell later.

P.S. Just had an iced coffee with a triple shot of espresso and I think it's actually waking me up a bit. Yay!
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Bizzy Day

I never did finish my Coming Out Day story, and I don't think I will. Today was just too busy!

Besides biking up to the shelter to take care of that guinea pig I...

...had a late lunch at Octane
...created a design document for a new web site
...created the home page design for a new web site
...went through Cool Home Pages and put about 20 my bookmarks
...bought a hat for my dad
...got cold drinks at Mocha Delites
...went to a neighborhood-run candidates forum for Council and school board
...played with Luckie 'til she was breathing heavily

Right now I am going to do some web updates for CAP but I hope to be in bed by 1... which I hope will leave me less exhausted tomorrow morning than I have been the last couple of mornings.